xo, MH
fredag den 24. februar 2012
fredag den 17. februar 2012
Engelsk stil - Bottlemessage
"Jenny,! Come back here right now!"
"Mom, leave me alone!" I was furious. How dares she to tell me what to do! "I'm not a kid anymore! I'm almost 17, I think I'm perfectly capable of making my own decisions!"
"Jenny, I am serious!"
"Yea, so am I. Goodbye mom."
"If you leave now, you don't come back!"
"Oh don't worry, i don't think that would be a problem. Fuck off." I slammed the door. Auch. I could feel the anger raging inside me, and suddenly i wanted to scream. I didn't want it to end this way. I just.. Don't want her telling me what to do. I didn't mean to go this far.
I started walking. I had no goal, i just needed.. Air. Fresh air. I could feel the wind blowing slightly in my face. It was actually a lovely day. The sun was shining. It might actually be the warmest day in the year. At least so far. Since it was such a beautiful day, i decided to go to the beach.
I was walking at the shore I suddenly noticed a thing in the water. A glistening thing. I was curious, so I decided to go and see what it was. It was a bottle. At first I was a little disappointed, but then i noticed something inside it, so i grabbed it, and went into the shore to open the bottle. This was exciting. At first it wouldn't open, but at last i did it. Inside there was a paper. It wasn't a pretty piece of paper, but it wasn't a yellow ruined paper, like you see in these pirate-movies. Just.. A bit.. Not-pretty. I rolled it out and started reading.
"Dear Person."
The writing was very pretty. Couldn't possibly be a boy.
"If you read this, you obviously got my bottlemessage. You are not lucky. You are chosen to read my story. There is no particualy reason, i just need somebody to know.
My father died when i was 2. 4 months ago, my mom took her own life. I feel so alone. I'm being bullied at school. They all call me fat, even though I'm the skinniest girl in my class. They call me ugly. They call me a whore, even though i never even kissed a guy. I am starting to believe in what they say. That I'm an ugly fat whore. I mean, not whore whore. But.. I don't know. I just don't feel good enough. I'm a loser. I have no friends. Well, apart from Bob. He just doesn't talk.. He's a goldfish. So it would be wierd if he did. I'd might be a little scared if he just suddenly looked at me and said:. "Hey you." Bob is the only thing i've ever trusted. Or.. You know. I have a list of Bob's... Goldfish doesn't live very long.
I've cut. Alot. I still do. Sometimes i wonder if anyone would miss me if i just.. Disappeared. Would anybody miss me? Would they go to my funeral? Would there even be a funeral? No one cares about me anyway. I've also thought about how i would do it. How i would 'disappear' out of nowhere. How i would die. I don't like the word suicide. That's why i use the word disappear instead.- it seems less violent. I like the pain. I like the feeling of the cold knife against my skin. The pain.. The psychical pain that replaces the mental pain. It hurts, but I'd rather have that pain. But to be honest, I think what would be the best, would to feel to pain. To just end it all here. Now. Stop breathing. If it was just that easy. I live at my grandparents right now. They wont let me out of sight, and they're yelling at me for everything i do. I can't do anything right. And as much as i study, i can never get my grades good enough to please my grandpa. I feel so worthless.
___________________________________________________________
Den er ikke færdig... Men ja. Skal have et sted at opbevare den, og det blev her!
"Mom, leave me alone!" I was furious. How dares she to tell me what to do! "I'm not a kid anymore! I'm almost 17, I think I'm perfectly capable of making my own decisions!"
"Jenny, I am serious!"
"Yea, so am I. Goodbye mom."
"If you leave now, you don't come back!"
"Oh don't worry, i don't think that would be a problem. Fuck off." I slammed the door. Auch. I could feel the anger raging inside me, and suddenly i wanted to scream. I didn't want it to end this way. I just.. Don't want her telling me what to do. I didn't mean to go this far.
I started walking. I had no goal, i just needed.. Air. Fresh air. I could feel the wind blowing slightly in my face. It was actually a lovely day. The sun was shining. It might actually be the warmest day in the year. At least so far. Since it was such a beautiful day, i decided to go to the beach.
I was walking at the shore I suddenly noticed a thing in the water. A glistening thing. I was curious, so I decided to go and see what it was. It was a bottle. At first I was a little disappointed, but then i noticed something inside it, so i grabbed it, and went into the shore to open the bottle. This was exciting. At first it wouldn't open, but at last i did it. Inside there was a paper. It wasn't a pretty piece of paper, but it wasn't a yellow ruined paper, like you see in these pirate-movies. Just.. A bit.. Not-pretty. I rolled it out and started reading.
"Dear Person."
The writing was very pretty. Couldn't possibly be a boy.
"If you read this, you obviously got my bottlemessage. You are not lucky. You are chosen to read my story. There is no particualy reason, i just need somebody to know.
My father died when i was 2. 4 months ago, my mom took her own life. I feel so alone. I'm being bullied at school. They all call me fat, even though I'm the skinniest girl in my class. They call me ugly. They call me a whore, even though i never even kissed a guy. I am starting to believe in what they say. That I'm an ugly fat whore. I mean, not whore whore. But.. I don't know. I just don't feel good enough. I'm a loser. I have no friends. Well, apart from Bob. He just doesn't talk.. He's a goldfish. So it would be wierd if he did. I'd might be a little scared if he just suddenly looked at me and said:. "Hey you." Bob is the only thing i've ever trusted. Or.. You know. I have a list of Bob's... Goldfish doesn't live very long.
I've cut. Alot. I still do. Sometimes i wonder if anyone would miss me if i just.. Disappeared. Would anybody miss me? Would they go to my funeral? Would there even be a funeral? No one cares about me anyway. I've also thought about how i would do it. How i would 'disappear' out of nowhere. How i would die. I don't like the word suicide. That's why i use the word disappear instead.- it seems less violent. I like the pain. I like the feeling of the cold knife against my skin. The pain.. The psychical pain that replaces the mental pain. It hurts, but I'd rather have that pain. But to be honest, I think what would be the best, would to feel to pain. To just end it all here. Now. Stop breathing. If it was just that easy. I live at my grandparents right now. They wont let me out of sight, and they're yelling at me for everything i do. I can't do anything right. And as much as i study, i can never get my grades good enough to please my grandpa. I feel so worthless.
___________________________________________________________
Den er ikke færdig... Men ja. Skal have et sted at opbevare den, og det blev her!
onsdag den 1. februar 2012
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